Difficulties understanding everday life

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It's a curse

I feel like the complete bottom of the barrel - maybe because I actually am. And no matter what I do I get reminded of my inability to cope with everyday life. I do not feel human at all.

No copes left

Whatever I do, I get reminded of it. Being a person interested in computers and computer science, I get to expierence the frustrating limitations set by my cognitive ability more often than I'd like to. "Everyone, expierences failure, no matter how good they are at anything", "Nobody's born a master at anything". Well, but I EXPIERENCE NOTHING BUT FAILURE. Since young age I obsess over theoretical computer science, read countless books (still counting), spent hours watching video guides, tried a lot myself and what did I get out of it? NOTHING, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. I barely can write fizzbuzz in C or in POSIX shell or whatever. Screw it. Ok, lemme try real quik. Here:

					
#include &l;stdio.h>
void main(){
	for(int i=0; i&l;10; i++){
		if(i%3 == 0){
			printf("Fizz\n");
		}if else(i%5 == 0){
			printf("Buzz\n");
		}else{
			printf("d", i);
			printf("%s", "\n");
		}
	}
}
					
				

Cool. I actually managed to write fizzbuzz

Living on my own

Living an autonomous life feels so completely, I don't know, unimaginable. I do not know where to begin. Everything that makes up an adult man's life frightens me. It's so complex, so loud, so irritating, I doubt I will ever be able to work at some kind of job. It could be the most simple task, I will just horribly fail at it. Life is already difficult enough and that without any responsibilities or anything.

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